5 steps to negotiate better

The pandemic has turned 2020 upside down. The changes in professional and private lives can cause conflicts if handled poorly. We believe the way forward is to negotiate with an open mind and in a collaborative manner. Easier said than done, you might say. These five steps give you a glimpse of what you can learn in our trainings.

Step 1: Choose your goals

Writing down your objectives is essential to measure success.

However, go beyond defining your red line. Envisage your ideal scenario and research other options. There is no need to go over the top. You can follow Roger Fisher and William L. Ury’s advice. The two researchers from the Harvard Negotiation Project invented the acronym B.A.T.N.A. - your best alternative to a negotiated agreement. This is your plan B.

How does this look in practice? Imagine you aim to rent a new office. Before submitting any offer, take a sheet of paper, do some research and write down three things:

• My goal: [A] m2 for € [X]

• My red line: [B] m2 for € [Y]

• My plan B: I will […]

Note that two of the three items list a monetary value. For the goal and red line, we recommend to also think about what this amount should cover (for example, taxes, utility bills, duration of contract…). Your plan B should be an action (e.g. If the rent exceeds my red line, I will ask for a break and call another real estate agency.) Never share your plan B because it would be like playing poker with an open hand.

Step 2: Conduct a first round

Negotiations should take longer than in the Wild West but might feel like a duel at the beginning.

‘Who should make the first offer?’ is a common question. It depends on the amount of information available. If you are well-informed, feel free to kick-off.

The person with the initial proposal generally gains the advantage because they establish reference points and frame the discussion.

This effect is called anchoring. You may have encountered it when you went shopping during sales and saw price tags where the discount is mentioned next to the initial price. Anchoring works in the political world as well, which is why lobbying a European Commission proposal is more effective than asking Members of the European Parliament to amend it afterwards.

Should you feel confident to go first, we recommend to be both ambitious and reasonable. Your proposal ought to be closer to your ideal goal than your red line.

In case you prefer to wait and see, that is also fine. Let’s look at the advantages of not rushing an agreement.

Step 3: Challenge assumptions

We believe a collaborative mindset trumps positional bargaining. Instead of hasty haggling and rigid thinking, try to take your time to explore interests and styles. After all, you are negotiating with humans, not robots.

Most negotiations consist of multiple items and aspects. When we discuss contracts, for instance, people put a lot of emphasis on the salary or price. Although money matters, you can surpass win-lose situations through effective listening and by exchanging information. Ask open-ended questions in order to understand what matters to whom, how much and spot conflicting interests as well as potential synergies. Ignorance is not bliss, but knowledge is power.

Lessons about grey areas from an orange quarrel

Step 4: Continue or conclude

Am I happy? Are the interests aligned? If the answer to either question after a negotiation meeting is "no", do not concede.

With tough counterparts, you can follow some advice from the Kremlin School of Negotiation: Identify attacks. Take a break. Bring it back to a rational mode. Never hesitate to ask for some time to digest information and think of solutions.

Should you, however, answer both questions with "yes", you can conclude. While a handshake may suffice after a long meeting, don’t forget to put the agreement and terms down in writing. Pen down who does what, by when and clarify any ambiguous parts. Although legal documents are far from being plain, we advise you to put some time aside to read everything before you sign. This reduces regrets and is in the interest of all the parties involved.

Step 5: Check compliance

Dried ink does not ensure that the deal is done. Your goal is not to simply obtain an agreement but the right action, which is why we can only celebrate if we deem the outcome beneficial and every one follows through. When people overcommit or get sidetracked, we recommend to take stock together.

Ability vs motivation - in their New York Time’s Best Seller, Kerry Patterson et al. name these as two reasons for inaction. If you notice things going wrong, keep calm and try to identify the underlying factor, provide resources and improve relationships. Once things go right, you can rest on your laurels or even ponder the possibility of a post-settlement settlement. Remember there is an option to revisit compromises and upgrade them as long as all accept.

Exercise

You have inherited an empty 25 m2 studio in decent conditions on Place de Bethléem, St Gilles from a distant relative. It is now in your name and you do not have to pass by the notary or the authorities again. As you already share a flat with your partner in Brussels, you have decided to put the studio up for rent. You have, however, never advertised a flat and will have to do some research. Define your goal, red line and plan B before negotiating with a friend.

Beyond the monthly rent, are there any other conditions you are keen on setting? Who would be your ideal tenant? Are you in a hurry or can you take your time? An empty studio would cost you €120 every month to pay for the concierge and some utilities.

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